The Voices In My Head: Harper Lee Weinstock

The Voices In My Head website and all material contained herein is the creation of writer/cartoonist Tim Knox and his various alter egos.

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RAMBLIN'S OF BILLY JOE BOB "BUDDY" HALSEY

A simple man, a simple mind

Billy Joe Bob "Buddy" Halsey was a good man with a good heart. He worked third shift at the Dunlop Tire Plant as a tire tosser and lived in a manufactured home in Hazel Green with his wife, Bootsie, and their two youngest rugrats, Darlene and Bucky (Darlene's the girl).

Tragically, Buddy's brief writing career was cut short when he fell into the machinery at the tire plant and was white-walled to death.

Think of him whenever you put air in your tires. Three of his best "scribblins" are below.

Another'n Bites The Dust
Lemme tell you what, Christmas morning at the Halsey hacienda was more excitin' than pickin' your teeth with a cattle prod. My youngest boy Bucky (the one with the Elvis shaped mole on his neck) woke us up about six, screamin' and hollerin' from the livin' room like his head was on fire and his butt was a catchin'!

Rangin' Out The Old
As usual, New Year's Eve in the park was more fun than runnin' naked through a Junior League dinner. For the tenth year in a row (except for '89, when he was in jail on a DUI charge) Big Buster Haley held the party at his doublewide. This year's theme was, "Come as you are, just brang beer."

Reclaimin' Cracker
Cracker? What the sam hill is a cracker? I was called a honky once, but that was by a white guy at work who heard it on Sanford and Son. Since he was obviously under the influence of television, I didn't take it too personal. But a cracker? Maybe I been cooped up in the trailer park too long, but that was a new one on me!